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How To Stop Self Sabotage Self Help Articles | March 31 Cheap Carlton Davis Jersey , 2008
Some can't figure out why things often start out beautifully either at work, in a relationship, or in a project and then always fall apart.But, self sabotage is common and many who are in the grip of it are unaware of what is going on. This article discusses the causes of self sabotage - why we don't let ourselves win, and what to do about it.


Self-sabotage Cheap Vita Vea Jersey , the action an individual takes, either consciously or unconsciously to harm themselves, is common. Some can't figure out why things start off beautifully and in a little while fall apart. At first it seems difficult to understand why an individual would pull the rug out from under their own feet, undertake a project, (or relationship) and when all is going well Cheap Noah Spence Jersey , find a way to ruin it. But many individuals who are in the grip of self-sabotage are either unaware of what they are doing, or unable to control it.


Fear of Success


Many factors contribute to self-sabotage and fear of success is a prominent one. Many individuals will not allow themselves, (or their projects or relationships) to succeed. Some feel that they do not deserve it. They harbor guilt or shame about who they are and will not allow themselves to win or to have that which they want in life. Some have a long history of being told by parents, friends or teachers that they are not worth much. (Some have told it to themselves). Like a poison arrow, this negative affirmation has gone deep within. These individuals Cheap Kendell Beckwith Jersey , believing it is true, cannot allow themselves to shine. Others feel that success is dangerous. The more successful they are, the happier and more fulfilled they are, the more others will dislike them. They subconsciously fear the jealousy of others, and negative repercussions that may come their way and feel guilty about having more than others have. A few get a reverse pleasure out of failing. They refuse to give their wives or family the pleasure of seeing them succeed. They are punishing others by failing Cheap Ali Marpet Jersey , not wanting them to reap the fruits of their success.


Attacking the Self


Needless to say when an individual cannot express his anger and frustration, this anger often turns around at the self. Some ways of attacking the self include, consistently choosing the wrong person for a relationship, choosing a job that is not right, staying in negative situations that pull you down Cheap Donovan Smith Jersey , being with people who do not respect you, taking on projects or challenges you are not suited to handle. Some begin acting out in ways that causes them to be rejected. Others secretly make others upset. Some run away at the last minute, renege on a promise, or can't be counted on.


Step 1: Stopping Self-Sabotage


We all need to take a moment and see the subtle (and perhaps not so subtle ways in which we sabotage ourselves. Make a list of that which does not go well in your life - repeatedly. How do you contribute to that? What do you do? (Or what do you not do?)What are other ways you could respond? List a few.


Step 2: Giving Yourself What You Need In each situation that goes wrong, what is it that you need to make it go right? Make a list. Today give yourself one. Tomorrow give yourself another. What do you need in general that you presently feel you are not getting? Give that to yourself as well. One day at a time.


Step 3: Communicating Honestly


One of the best antidotes for self-sabotage is open and honest communication Cheap Vernon Hargreaves III Jersey , both with others and with yourself. When we give ourselves permission to express our anger or upset responsibly, we do not have to take it out either on others or ourselves.See what it is that you are not saying to someone about the situation in which you are sabotaging yourself. Say it responsibly. This means do not "blame, attack or accuse" the other. Simply say, "This is how I feel about -----." You are taking responsibility for how you feel, not projecting it upon someone else. Ask for what you need to make things better. Most people have no idea what it is you need in a given situation. When you ask for what you need Cheap Chris Godwin Jersey , (and give the other person room to say no), you open the door to getting your needs met and do not have to attack either yourself or another.


Step 4: Make Friends With Yourself


This step is vital. What is it that you want in a good friend? Write it down. B)Give this to yourself. Each day choose one item on the list and give it to yourself. When we learn how to become our own good friend, we develop the ability to stop self-sabotage before it starts. And we have that which we long for from others right with us wherever we go.

Article Tags: Allow Themselves


Work At Home Data Entry Jobs Business Articles | June 3, 2010
If you are looking for a genuine home based job, then work at home data entry jobs are the best option for you. It requires little effort to make decent money.


If in case you are searching for a genuine home based job Cheap Justin Evans Jersey , then work at home data entry jobs are the best choice for you. However, you need to have patience as it takes some time and efforts to earn a good income. Data entry is the process of simply filling up online forms and also submit them in the necessary format. The work is quite simple and hardly takes an hour to understand it, and soon start off immediately with the work. There are several organizations that would provide online training to fully understand the job. There is no need to leave your home to get training for this job. An important certification to get this job is to have simple computer experience and also capability to access the web. But you require three mail things to start with the job, a genuine email ID, a PC and reliable interne. Cheap Jerseys Cheap NFL Jerseys Wholesale Cheap NCAA Jerseys Cheap Jerseys Wholesale Wholesale MLB Jerseys Free Shipping